Have you ever pondered your life’s purpose?
I have. More times than I care to admit probably.
Sometimes I look around and wonder how I got here, and why I’m not somewhere else.
You see my whole life ( well at least as far back as I can remember) all I ever wanted to do, was be a musician. As a young child I used to watch the music awards and picture myself accepting the Best song of the year award. Yes, I was going to be a famous song writer.
Then something happened that changed the course of my musical direction. My baby brother got a beginner guitar for Christmas. You know one of the cheap ones with the plastic strings that are made too look real. It came with a little booklet that taught you basic chords and strums. I took that guitar and locked myself in my room night after night until I learned every chord. Then I stood in front of my mirror and played while I sang every song the radio played.
Now I had no idea what chords the songs were actually in, nor did I care. I was a star in my own mind and I played to my audience of myself and my baby brother, who by the way, thought I was amazing. From that moment on I just knew I was going to be a famous musician. The next year for Christmas I received my own guitar. It was a beginners guitar, but to me it was the beginning of my road to fame.
It has been 40 plus years since those nights of rocking out in my bedroom, and I am still not a famous musician, nor have I won any music awards. And if I have to be honest, I am really not that great of a guitar player, although I have been called the Queen of karaoke more than once.
So why is this story relevant to the title of this blog?
Because I am not a musician. It is not who I am, or who I was ever meant to be. Now, it is one of my favorite hobbies. I have had a guitar or two all of my life. I have taken guitar lessons and voice lessons and I am part of an amazing music scene. I have spent hour upon hour practicing, to the point at times, that the tips of my fingers actually bled. I’ve warmed up my voice, did vocal strengthening, and practiced breathing techniques.
But I am still not a famous musician.
I have also filled notebooks full of writings. Some poetry, short stories, songs and I just finished my first full-length novel that I am hoping to get published sometime in the future. But no one from Nashville is knocking on my door to turn any of my writings into the next big hit.
But I am something.
Something very important.
I am a massage therapist. It is the other thing I have done since I was very young. In fact I was massaging family members before I was teaching myself how to play chords on a plastic guitar. And more important, unlike playing guitar, massage came easy. In fact, it is and has always been easy, natural even.
I have never had to work hard to do massage. Even when I went to massage school to become a licensed therapist, it seemed to be my second nature. Throughout my massage career I have asked God why he made me a healer instead of a massage therapist. The only answer I have ever received is through all the times I have been told I have magic hands. Or phone calls asking me if there was anyway I could do a massage that day to get rid of whatever ailment my client was suffering with.
Now does the fact that I am not the musician I have always wanted to be mean I am a failure? Absolutely not!
Have you ever met someone who seemed like they were living their dream life but they were absolutely miserable? You ask yourself why that person is so miserable when they have everything they claim to want. But then on the other hand you meet someone who seems to have nothing, yet they are so happy. Life just seems like a breeze to them.
Maybe it’s because the happy person is living in their true nature. They know who they are and they live their life according to that nature. When I try and try and try to be the guitar player/singer I so badly dream of being I start getting depressed, I feel like an absolute failure because I am not as good as the people I look up too.
But when I put my hands on someone and within minutes they are feeling better. My soul is happy. I know without a shadow of a doubt that is my life’s calling.
So now I will ask you again. Who are you? Are you living life according to your nature? When you are doing whatever it is you do, does it feel natural? Does it make you happy?
Or are you struggling to become something you think you should be, even though no matter how hard you try, practice, work at it, you never feel like
you’re good enough.
God created us all with a purpose and each of our purposes are different. That is what makes the world go around, This is not to say that I, you, can’t practice at that thing we love, and get good enough at it to enjoy it as a hobby. But if it isn’t your nature, if it doesn’t come natural to you, it is always, ALWAYS, going to be work. And when it doesn’t turn out as good as you want, you are going to feel disappointment, In the dream, in yourself, in whatever you feel is holding you back from being that thing you want to be, but are not created to be.
Yes, you can be anything you want to be. The motivational speakers are not lying to you. You can work and work and work to become that person or you can figure out what comes natural and do that instead.
I challenge you to search yourself, and instead of thinking about what it is you have always told yourself you would be or do, ask yourself what it is that feels natural when you do it. What causes that catch in your breath or makes you smile without having to think about it.
What seems so easy that you don’t even think about it?
That is your purpose.
That is who you were created to be.
That is where you are going to stop trying so hard to live life and start living a life you can actually enjoy.